Tell Me Everything

First day of new schedules... how was it? Not great.

Connor was NOT in any of my classes (surprise surprise, right?). I think I'll just give a run-down on each of my classes.

1st period: Ingles, mi clase favorito. I sat by Phil and Kathryn and Max, and it was just awesome. Pretty much everyone had friends in there so we were really loud and basically didn't listen to anything Ms. Singleton said. :)

2nd period: Spanish. I'll have to keep you updated on whether or not I like it. Mckenna, Tess, Brittani, and Savannah sat right by me. They are not what you need at like, 8:30 AM >.< The best part (by far) is the hunka hunka burnin' love that sat across the room. Hahahahaha. He was so freaking 'OH EM GEE.' Like, male model. He's big, but not as in fat. He's tall and fills out his clothes (WITH MUSCLE!) and he has a deep voice. And PER-FECT hair. But I'm pretty positive he's not a freshman (and probably not even a sophomore either).

3rd period: Math. Well, I can't say anything nice about the coursework, that's for sure. I don't like when teachers let you sit anywhere when you don't know anyone in the class, which is what happened in math. I sat behind Ashley Romano, who I sat behind before. Then pretty much all the seats around us filled up with these skaters. Okay?

4th period: Bio. I DIDN'T FAIL MY LAB! I DIDN'T FAIL MY LAB! I GOT AN A! Ahem. Yeah. I don't like bio now that Tracey and Carrie aren't in my class :( I had to sit by Karina and Hiedi and Matt. Blahh.

5th period: P.E. We just hung out in the gym the whole period, which is alright. Ginny and Kathryn and Phil are in my class, but we're going to be seperated into levels for swim, so I don' know...

6th period: Health. It was sooo incredibly boring today. We got there, and we had a sub, so she was all, "We're going to go to the library in about 10 minutes to get your Health books." So we did nothing for 10 minutes, went to the library, that took all of 5 minutes, then sat around for the rest of the period. I knew about 2 people in there, and niether of them sat by me. That sucked. Except this REALLY INSANELY CUTE guy sat near me. He's asian, kind of seems like wasian a little bit, and he also has like perfect emo/skater hair. He's loud and funny, which seems to be the kind of guy I go for. And Sanjaya! Yeah, we have a guy who looks just like Sanjaya. Fun stuff.



PHIL WHEN WILL I FIND OUT WHO LIKES ME???

My Heart is the Worst Kind of Weapon

*is trying to the of a good beginning sentence, and can't*

Why can I not stop thinking about supposed-crushing-on-me guy? Seriously? WHO IS IT?? This is unfair. The conversation with Phil gave me a few (very few) facts about him. Firstly, he's good looking. And I asked Phil about his judgement on good looking guys, and he said that at least girls think mystery man is okay looking. Adding to that, he has okay fashion sense, meaning it's not Phil-like but it's not terrible (which, really, doesn't give me any basis at all). Well, we already have what he said about me, but I asked Phil if the guy was serious, and he said the conversation went something like this:
He-Who-I-Do-Not-Know-The-Name-Of: "Hey Phil, you have a girlfriend, right?"
Phil: "Yeah, why?"
"Well, I like this girl, but I don't know what to do? Could you help?"
"Who's the girl?"
"Olivia Ross."
And that's all he told me about that. I might be able to figure something from how he said my whole name (as opposed to just Olivia), and yet I can't think of anything. Oh, and Phil also made it clear that it was an 'aquiantance.' That doesn't give me anything. I asked him if I would find out who it is. He said I would, but not from him (Phil). WTF???

The Future Freaks Me Out

So, it's 11 PM on a Saturday night, what am I doing? Of course I'm on the computer. Of course I've been on it for 2 hours (in one sitting).

Nicole and Phil worked out their problems! Hoorah! Yeah, I was totally in the middle of all that. Sucky, huh? Oh well, I'm glad they've straightened everything out.

So we took our finals on Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday. I think they were all pretty easy. EXCEPT BIO. The lab, my God, I messed up so much. The sugar was supposed to turn the yeast samples blue and yellow, but mine turned both of them blue. Ahh, whenever I think about it I get frustrated. So I'll stop. But if I don't get a good enough grade on it, I have a B in bio :/

The new semester starts this Wednesday. Do I want it to start? I don't know. I just want to like, have a list of everyone in my classes. That way I can decide if I am looking forward to it or not. And, as said before, I want Connor in at least one of my classes.

Alright, now that Phil and Nicole are cool again, I figure it's okay for me to pester Phil with my problems again. I told him tonight that I was thinking... What if I'm one of those girls that like, never gets a boyfriend? Or that I'll be 18, still in the same situation I'm in right now. And then I think he said being single is okay or something, and I responded by saying that it was easy for him to say, being attractive to a lot of girls. He told me that he knows about two guys that think I'm 'attractive.' One as a fact, or whatever. I asked him what he said about me and when. Phil said that he said: "'Olivia's really cute. I think she's like...adorable. She smiles so great! (somin like that) I like her, but I don't know if she likes me.'"
He told me that this person said it about a week or two ago. And of course, he can't tell me who said that. >.< Except for sure it's not Connor. (He also reassured me that this person 'is not that bad looking.' Alright?)

And you know what? My self esteem is so low that I pretty much don't believe him. That's right. I think he's flat out lying. Well, I guess I believe that HE believes it. I just don't. And my hope gets the better of me (once again) as I try to figure out who would tell him that. It's probably one of his friends, and I guess he's not bad looking.

???

Battle Hymn

FINALS WEEK. Actually, it's not really that bad. I think my like.. senses.. are too calm. Haha, I probably should be stressing, and yet I'm not. It's wierd. It's like I'm on some calm-down drug. Hm.

Oh, I am upset at schedule changes. I get that you have to change electives, but why the whole schedule? Basically, you make new friends, and right after, they make you switch and find new friends. It's like this one Clandestine hoodie I've always like: "Give love, then take it away." Well, it's hard to explain. And I don't have any classes with Nicole anymore :( The ONE possible good thing that can come out of this is that Connor could be in one of my new classes. I'm trying not to hope on this one. It's a long shot anyway (I'm desperate).

Another thing. I am very glad that I don't like Chad anymore. You know how they say men who wear jewelry are vain or whatever? So Chad has always worn this one necklace, it's like his thing. That's okay and all. But today he found some pinky ring on the ground and started wearing it. It's a total like bling thing and NOT FOR CHAD. All of us were like begging him to take it off but he wouldn't. Dude, that would be embarrassing if I still liked him. Hahaha.

I'm not going to go to Winter Formal. I will if A. I win a ticket for free or B. Connor asks me. Yeah, niether is going to happen (although I do have a slight slight chance for that free ticket). So I was talking to Bella and Sam today and Bella asked if we were going to Winter Formal, and both of us said, "Probably not." I told them the that I would only go if I got a free ticket, and Sam agreed. The Bella asked me if I would go if some one asked me, and I said, "Probably not." They laughed and whatever, but like, no one's going to ask me anyway. And I wouldn't want to go with anyone but Connor, so yeah :/


Life, all in all, is alright now. It's a 'meh' kind of time. Not good, not bad. Meh.

(There are no) Raindrops on Roses and Girls and White Dresses

It's sleeping with roaches and taking best guesses
the shade of the sheets and before all the stains
and a few more of your least favorite things..

I am currently in love with Panic! at the Disco. Well, that song. Build God, Then We'll Talk. I AM in love with lead guitarist and lyricist, Ryan Ross. Ryro. I love him. He is gorgeous! And he has that face, where you can tell how shy and sweet and quiet he is. Plus he the lyricist, which also kind of says something. He's only 21. I mean, that's only a 7 year difference...

I LOVE HIM!

Cough. Okay. More important things then. (Did I mention he is fabulous live? or his Ryro makeup? yeah I'm done now.) So finals week is coming up. Blahh I hate it! I've already had to give a speech and do a skit for spanish. I got a 96 on the freshmen speech and I don't know about spanish yet, but I'm guessing I did pretty well. Oh, and the math test on Tuesday, well. I don't think I did very well on that at all.. There were two that I had no freaking idea how to do, so I left the answers blank. I mean, I tried the bonus, but I probably got it wrong anyway.

I'm thinking that song has made me kinda ehh-ish. I don't know, I don't care anymore. Sure, everytime I see Connor it really sucks. But I just haven't really been 'there' lately, if you know what I mean. Well, whatever.

Wishing to be the Friction in Your Jeans

Teenage girl - regular contact with teenage boys = D:

Yes. I have become boy deprived over this break, and you can tell. Firstly, that guy Silas at my grandma's birthday dinner. I was practically drooling. And well, I told Phil he looked a lot like Nick Jonas. Who did I crush on next? Nick Jonas. I know. Ashamed, I am. And I found this guy in a magazine, Austin Butler, he's been on Zoey 101 and Hannah Montana and iCarly and he soooooooo cute!!!! New celebrity crush, mmmmm.

I had this dream last night; don't judge me on it. I was basically in love with some one, although it wasn't anyone in particular that I can recall. I was just in the arms of some tall (very tall), broad guy. And I could really feel the true love. I don't know D: How embarrassing.

Is it wierd that the new year depresses me? I think it might be because last year my resolution was to finally find a boyfriend. I didn't make any resolutions this year.